Sadness

Sensation:

Sadness is a feeling of loss or absence, with a focus on all the things we ‘do not have’. It is characterised by an inward focus, and it is felt deep within the body. Because it may be difficult to name or describe, it may also be difficult to share it with others. However, sadness is an important emotion. For example, if we experience the death of a loved one, sadness and its inward focus allow us to focus our energy and work through it to a point till we become ready for the changes necessary to adapt to living with the loss.

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Often it is not the initial trigger itself which leads to a lasting feeling of sadness. Rather, it is the self-limiting beliefs we attach to feeling sad. For instance, in a society that rewards cheerfulness and movement, the heaviness and low mood accompanying sadness may provoke judgment – both in the self or from others. At times, sadness is associated with weakness or the feeling that we may be flawed, damaged or a failure. Instead of recognising that sadness is a natural response to loss, we may start believing that we are trapped, disempowered or in some way not good enough.

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Sadness differs in intensity and duration, affecting a person’s ability to organize and complete daily tasks. If the feeling lasts longer than a few months, it may lead to chemical changes in the brain and mental health problems.

Signs:

There are many variations of sadness, feelings such as melancholy or grief. Sadness may manifest in:

  • Low energy and motivation
  • Slowness
  • A decreased experience of happiness
  • A decreased expectation to be happy
  • Breathing difficulties
  • A lasting pain in back, shoulders or chest
  • A general feeling of heaviness, exhaustion and tiredness

Sadness differs in intensity and duration, affecting a person’s ability to organize and complete daily tasks. If the feeling lasts longer than a few months, it may lead to chemical changes in the brain and mental health problems.

If we experience prolonged sadness, our physical processes (such as at the time we eat and sleep) and our impulses (sexual urges, angry outbursts and tears) may lose their natural rhythm. Furthermore, our cognitive capacities – our ability to perceive, process and act upon our thoughts – may be disturbed.

Self-care practices:

It is important to break out of this prolonged or fixated sadness by bringing attention to the outward and physical world. This can be done through a variety of ways:

  • Pay attention to your natural rhythms, eating and sleeping at a rhythm that helps you optimize your energy. For example, sleep for at least 6-8 hours during the night and eat a nutritious meal or snack every 5-6 hours during the day.
  • Try to turn off all technological devices – be it your phone, TV, or computer – at least one hour before going to bed.
  • Exercise, go for walks, connect with nature.
  • Engage your sense of touch by working with your hands. For example, doing some art, knitting, playing music, cooking or gardening are ways to engage in a creative pursuit that helps alleviate sadness.
  • Talk to somebody who you trust and may be able to support you in this experience.

It is also beneficial to engage your mind in new ways:

  • Pursue your hobbies! Do what brings you joy and meet people whose company you enjoy.
  • Pay attention to your self talk, that voice in your mind that tells you whether you are right or wrong, good or bad. Challenge the voice when it depletes your energy, encourage the voice when it supports you to help yourself.
  • Help others, even in small ways, without expecting something in return. It helps to support others in their times of distress and difficulty.
  • Do something that you have never done before – start going for a walk or watch the sunrise everyday. Experiencing things in new ways could have a significant impact on the way you feel about yourself and the world around you.