Standing at 5 ft. 7 inches and weighing around 48 kg, I have always been considered pretty skinny by those around me. And not all of them meant it as a compliment. ‘Hawa chalegi toh urh jaogi’, ‘kuch khati nai ho kya?’, and ‘mareez lag rahi ho’ are statements that I am a little too familiar with. It is as if my slender body is a synonym for deficiency while I have never been uncomfortable in my own skin.
The comments which made me the angriest were the ones that took the liberty of associating specific eating disorders with me. Anorexia being the top choice. One colleague even went as far as assuming that I was suffering from bulimia nervosa because she found a thin person like me working out in the gym. ‘Why do you work out even though you are so thin? Do you make yourself throw up also?’, she casually asked.
For those who do not know, and I am sure this includes those who carelessly use these names, anorexia is an eating disorder characterized by an obsessive desire to lose weight by refusing to eat, while bulimia nervosa may involve losing weight through self-induced vomiting or purging. Thankfully, I do not suffer from either of these but there are others who do. And when we misuse these terms to describe perfectly healthy individuals, we are trivializing the trauma that other individuals go through. So the first thing that we need to do is educate ourselves on the kind of disorders that exist and then use that vocabulary responsibly.
Moreover, we need to become more sensitive and empathetic while speaking to other people. Blatantly asking someone if they are bulimic is definitely not the most polite conversation to have and also not any of your business, unless you can help that person in any way.
There are many people like me who are completely healthy. We are not suffering. We do not go to the gym to lose weight. We are just thin. And we are happy with the way we look, as should everyone be.
Farheen is currently working as a content writer at The Dawood Foundation, but wishes to remain connected to the world of mental health, and spread awareness about the stigmas attached to it. Having struggled with mental health herself, Farheen found her refuge in words and hopes that others may find inspiration in those words also.